The lonely whale →
The lonely whale A baleen whale that’s been tracked by the Navy since 1992 can’t attract a mate because his singing voice is too high. To make matters worse, the high-pitched whale “does not follow the known migration route of any extant baleen whale species.” The result, according to Dr. Kate Stafford, a researcher at the National Marine Mammal Laboratory in Seattle, is that the lonely whale keeps “saying ‘Hey, I’m out here,’” but “nobody is phoning home.”
I’ve only read this 15 minutes ago, but I’ve already cried for at least 8 hours.
Can’t we just give him a little portable translator that filters his voice into the frequency of other whales? Or just follow him and play a recording of other whales saying stuff? Just give him a telephone conversation? “Hi, Craig. Yeah, no, don’t go looking for me. Let’s just talk. Do you know where Nelson got his tie from? Brooks Brothers? When did Nelson learn to roam in fresh water?”
But then another article says he might even be deaf, so it doesn’t even matter. It doesn’t even matter. Nothing matters. We’re all just mysterious whales, floating along in the chilling, crisp ocean; alone, alone, alone.
(Cue Charlie Brown dance.)
